my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
