I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
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