is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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