So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
