im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
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