That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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