gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize