super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Randomize
