I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
