yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
my being single is dangerous.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Randomize
