think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
