I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Your tits are I can't wait for
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
