ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I yelled at your uterus for you.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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