Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
