uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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