Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
