i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize