His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Randomize
