your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
