have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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