Texts From Last Night

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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."

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  (202): And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan." http://tfl.nu/9mrq
  Replies (17) Good night (2007) Bad night (753)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.

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  (434): Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad. http://tfl.nu/ab13
  Replies (41) Good night (917) Bad night (3560)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.

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  (602): So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw. http://tfl.nu/cazb
  Replies (19) Good night (3987) Bad night (758)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario

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  (770): he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario http://tfl.nu/em7y
  Replies (6) Good night (825) Bad night (3658)
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  (916): View more from California

  Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?

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  (916): Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents? http://tfl.nu/8kv6
  Replies (20) Good night (2564) Bad night (1379)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children

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  (248): The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children http://tfl.nu/7xpu
  Replies (6) Good night (4448) Bad night (862)
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  (867): View more from Yukon/N.W.Territory

  I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly

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  (867): I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly http://tfl.nu/gz7h
  Replies (3) Good night (824) Bad night (1690)
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  (+81): View more from

  I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?

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  (+81): I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing? http://tfl.nu/61om
  Replies (4) Good night (753) Bad night (379)
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  (631): View more from New York

  Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps

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  (631): Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps http://tfl.nu/unlw
  Replies (2) Good night (413) Bad night (784)
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  (310): View more from California

  Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere

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  (310): Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere http://tfl.nu/c0r9
  Replies (2) Good night (371) Bad night (844)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.

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  (248): PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW. http://tfl.nu/5tmy
  Replies (7) Good night (1128) Bad night (415)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.

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  (330): That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's. http://tfl.nu/6ug9
  Replies (0) Good night (351) Bad night (709)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm

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  (316): I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm http://tfl.nu/e7hi
  Replies (1) Good night (260) Bad night (435)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts

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  (610): Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts http://tfl.nu/c7v2
  Replies (0) Good night (474) Bad night (319)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.

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  (702): I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now. http://tfl.nu/cei7
  Replies (1) Good night (342) Bad night (294)

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