note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize