What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
