I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
