could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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