I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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