there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize