That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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