Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
