I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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