The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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