guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize