OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize