well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
