me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
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