i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
