He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize