u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
23 Men Confess What Gifts Would Brighten Their Day
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes