Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize