I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
