I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
