Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize