Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
