don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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