If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
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