i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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