Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
