Dual....:-)
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
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