She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
