okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Randomize
